Relationships are work, they are an investment. This means they take time to build, effort to grow, and protection to thrive.
It’s funny how we look at our jobs, schooling, a career, or the pursuit of a dream as needing intentional effort, but assume our relationships will just happen. No healthy, thriving relationship just happens, it is invested in.
Think about your relationships for a moment. How many deep ones do you have? Deep as in, these relationships are life giving to you, like an underground spring. Most people don’t have many. Why? Because underground springs must be dug out. Either it doesn’t seem worth the time, you don’t exude the effort, or every time you dig a bit the dirt is thrown back in.
Time. Meaningful relationships don’t happen over night. As a result, many people don’t give their relationships a chance. They give up on them before they have time to take root, mature, or begin to flourish. If you are going to develop depth in your relationships you need to be willing to invest time in them.
Effort. Meaningful relationships will never develop without effort. How often do you actually intentionally think about making effort to help your relationships grow? How often are you strategic in the way you reach out to those you desire to be in relationship with? If you are just sitting back and waiting for connection to happen you are setting yourself up for let down
Protection. Meaningful relationships must be protected. You have to care enough about your relationships to guard them from toxicity. If you want depth then you need to ensure no dirt continues to be thrown in your well. Toxicity is negativity, judgmental attitudes, blaming, distrust, secrecy, dishonesty or condescending criticism. These things destroy relationships. You have to be intentional to ensure these things don’t creep into your relationships and if you see them you need to address them head on.
Life is about relationships, the rest is just details. You were not made to live in isolation. If you run from relationships you will find yourself living a miserable, lonely, isolated, and self-centered life. But, when you embrace the reality that life is about relationships then you will recognize the joy and responsibility you have to enter into meaningful, life giving relationships.
The more you pass the buck to others the less you will take responsibility to make your relationships great. Leave it to others and you will have others to blame. This is how so many live and why so many have grudges towards others. Free them and free yourself from this toxicity. It’s time for you to take responsibility and choose to have intentional, life-giving relationships.
Relationships are work… And worth it.
Let’s Do This Together
How often do you leave it to others to reach out to your relationship with them? How can you begin to take responsibility to invest in your relationships?